It's 2010 and Jim Rome still has a goatee

When I first started this blog one of the things I wanted to make fun of was the sports media. I was driving a lot, which meant listening to a lot of sports talk on the radio. It's to be expected that any sports news will lack intellectual stimulation, but I found the misfortune of listening to one show in particular that was completely void of any thought. That show belonged to Jim Rome.

I haven't listened to his show since then, but was reminded of his existence today while searching for tailgating rules for the UCF Spring Game. The memories returned to me as if I was remembering why I hate lizards. Congratulations Jim Rome. Your show is just as bad as opening your blinds to see two lizards making hanky panky on the outside of your window and the girl lizard is bleeding out her vagina while a lizard dick is forced into it.

I'm not trying to shock anyone by talking about lizard dick. It's just the only comparison that does justice to how bad his radio show is. From what I understand he has a TV show, which might be watchable for all I know.

Perry Fewell, the running play and local sports radio

By now, you've watched the game. You've read the recaps. You've heard the callers on WGR. The Buffalo Bills finally broke free of their fourth quarter doldrums and poured on 24 points in the final frame to beat the Dolphins.

Ryan Fitzpatrick hooked up with Terrell Owens (remember him?) on another long TD pass. You've read all of that. You might have also come across one other thing in your postgame media breakdown that isn't as fun or exciting as those.

Yesterday, during the postgame show on local sports favorite WGR550, hosts Mike Schopp and the Bulldog (sources cannot confirm whether this host is an actual bulldog) discussed the Bills' last offensive play of the game. Buffalo had 1st-and-goal at the Miami seven yard line, with 1:25 remaining and leading by 10 points.

Fitzpatrick handed off to Fred Jackson and Jackson did the rest. He found the end zone. Seems pretty standard, right? You're that deep into the opponent's red zone, it's late in the game, so you hand the ball off hoping to get Jackson some more yards and the offensive line a chance to hit somebody. Not to mention to run time off the clock.

Apparently, according to the WGR hosts, there is some kind of sportsmanship rule that says that you have to fall on the ball three times in that situation. Never mind that you're only up by 10 at that point. Never mind that you're not calling a fade route to Owens or Evans. You can't even run the ball. You have to kneel on it, or you're showing poor sportsmanship. You're running up the score.

Now, I could see their point if, like the Patriots, they were leading 52-0 and dialed up a long throw to a wide receiver. I could even see it if they were leading by 17 points. I could see it if Fitzpatrick had thrown for 300+ yards and Jackson had 100. But they didn't. They were leading by 10. Running up the score doesn't even come into play until about three scores.

And that's not even the main reason why I disagree with their point. Why, then, do I think it was a good idea to run the ball in that situation?

It was the opposite of what Dick Jauron would've done.

The Bills Fire Another Guy, This Time It's the Right One

According to multiple sources, the Buffalo Bills have fired head coach Dick Jauron, two days after losing to the 2-6 Titans by a score of 41-17. It's not exactly a gutsy move by owner Ralph Wilson, but avid followers of the team will know that Wilson isn't really a gutsy owner. At least they finally got rid of him. Maybe the new coach will install an offense that is actually difficult for NFL players to defend against.

It's about time. Does anyone know if Wilson has Bill Cowher's cell number?

Much Ado About Marcus Jordan

College basketball is here! Meaning that Marcus Jordan just played in his first college game in a packed UCF Arena. Jordan drew quite the crowd. It was only the second time I had seen the student section in the lower bowl full, the first being against Memphis last year. Most of the news about him has been his refusal to wear the team sponsored Adidas shoes. Marcus Jordan, nerdy goggles and all, put up a disappointing performance for the packed house, scoring zero points and missing two free throws.

Every touch of the ball by Jordan excited the crowd. "That's a Jordan move." Was said by a fan after Marcus juked a defender. With all the attention on Marcus, Isaac Sosa put up 26 points and I can proudly proclaim that I shop at the same grocery store as him.

As for the other basketball games of the night Michigan State, Kentucky, Duke, Purdue, and Kansas beat teams that many people have never heard of. No wonder people don't care until March.

Content! It's a Podcast!

This week, I decided to add a podcast in an effort to actually start providing more content for Life on the Bandwagon. I know, it's shocking to some of you that we had no updates in the month of October. That is about to change! I present to you Volume 1 of a hopefully ongoing series of audio podcasts based on Life on the Bandwagon. It's hosted temporarily on Sendspace right now, just click the link to download, load into your favorite audio listening program or device and enjoy! This week's podcast is NFL commentary along with featured music by the band Conditions from Richmond, Va. Next week will be a more full-length feature involving sports, media, and possibly a special guest! Feedback is appreciated.

The NFL Network, or how I learned to stop worrying and not watch Thursday Night Football

So, imagine my surprise when I found out that Thursday Night Football started up last night with the 49ers of San Francisco against the Cutlers of Chicago. I listen to a lot of sports radio, read a lot of sports blogs and watch SportsCenter. I had NO idea this was happening until a friend happened to mention that Jay Cutler was sucking even more than usual. The reason I didn't know? Time Warner decided to make its customers pay for an extra tier of service in order to get the NFL Network. For 8 extra games, Time Warner wants me to pay more. When I can already see all the games I want to on Sunday and Monday. Sorry, guys. Not happening.

And what did I miss? I missed a riveting 10-6 defeat of the Chicago Bears at the hands of the mighty 4-5 San Francisco 49ers. I missed Jay Cutler throwing more passes to the Niners at one point. This is what Time Warner wants me to pay more for? Really?

I'll stick with my basic cable, thanks. Somehow Time Warner must survive without it.

Bengals, Want to be good? Read this.

In the past 18 years the Bengals have only been to the playoffs once and yesterday they did a remarkable job showing off their bad luck. I found myself watching the end of the game in hopes of a Brandon Marshall touchdown to help my fantasy team. Yes, I know it was a dumb pick but I just can't help but pick former UCF players and Buccaneers, except Matt Prater, bitch ruined Christmas in 2005. As you've probably seen, a pass to Brandon Marshall was tipped, caught by a Bronco and run in for a touchdown.

Now to get to my help for the Bengals. They need new uniforms. Dropping the creamsicle uniforms worked for the Bucs and could help the Bengals. Tiger print may have been cool during the coked up early 80s but now its primary purpose it as a background on high school girl's MySpace. Once the Bengals decide to look like a football team, instead of the leggings coming out of a plaid skirt in Hot Topic, the Bengals will have my pick as Super Bowl winner.